Some day when you have had a few drinks, suggest that you tour a sex shop to see what kinds of weird things that they have. Get the clerks to explain everything. Usually this is a lot of fun, and even if you do not purchase anything, you can laugh about it for weeks.
The rising costs of goods can put a serious crimp in purchasing a lot of sex toys. This is most true for BDSM. But even the most basic toys can cost a lot of money.
In an effort to help you stretch your shrinking sex toy dollar, I have compiled a list of low cost alternatives. Make sure that you check these out with a health expert. Allergies, or other problems can turn the most fun activity into a nightmare!
Getting Your Jollies In Public
If you are not getting enough through regular means, then try this. Set your phone on vibrate, and place it down the front of your drawers or panties. Now it is a simple matter to call your phone from another device. Hey, finally your will be able to enjoy telemarketers calling you all the time. If you turn off your voice mail, it will ring you into an orgasm! Sort of a dingle tingle. If you have two cell phones you can call yourself during meetings at work, thus keeping a pleasant smile on your face while others are nodding off. Who knows, you may even get a promotion for being so "attentive" and "upbeat".
Pure Pleasing Pleasure From Produce
Instead of spending a fortune on a dildo, find an inexpensive alternative. Go to the produce section of your local supermarket and pick an appropriate dildo substitute for pennies on the dollar. Just think, you can be standing beside your minister in the store, talking about last weeks sermon, and be selecting your next sex instrument right under his eyes. No more embarrassed skulking out of the sex shop anymore. What a plus! Once you have it home, wash it well in warm water and slide a condom on it. Add a bit of lube and go for it! The best options are:
1) Cucumber – (all time favorite for regular sized vaginas) make sure you de-nub it first
2) Carrot – this is better for smaller proportioned ladies
3) Zucchini – if you enjoy activities like fisting, you would likely have to turn to the stalwart zucchini to give you pleasure.
4) Baking Potato – be careful you do not lose it up there – the zucchini is likely more practical
5) Sweet potato – yams have some interesting kinks of their own. Warning, select carefully. What looks kinky in the market may prove painful in practice.
6) Celery – no matter which end you use, this one will likely be disappointing. Of course now a full bunch might just substitute well if you cannot find an appropriately sized zucchini!
7) Watermelon – What are you thinking of? Totally out of the question!
Once you have an item that works well, then it is safe to go to the adult store and buy a dildo of equal dimensions and perhaps contours. The best deal about veggie sex is that you can size the amount of your pleasure stick without resorting to a lot of expense. A few bucks can buy you three different size veggie prototypes to try, so if you ever go to the sex shop for a more permanent type toy, you know exactly the size to purchase.
Stay out of the deli department. Anything in there is just a bad idea, no matter how tempting!
Better Orgasms For Women In Real Live Situations
It is a published fact that many women can only achieve an orgasm by having their clitoris stimulated during sex. That’s why a lot of cock rings these days have a little vibrator on the top – so that with every deep thrust of the penis, the vibrator hits the plump clit and the woman gets stimulated. Lots of things in your daily life besides sex vibrators produce acceptable levels of vibration. All you have to do is to take advantage of them. Put something heavy like a running shoe in your washing machine and put it on a spin cycle. That will produce a lot of satisfying vibrations. You also have the fun of getting it off on top of the washing machine.
Try putting her cell phone on vibrate, hold it next to her clitoris while having sex, and call her repeatedly. This really pumps up the sexual satisfaction, and with most phone plans is dirt cheap to implement. Put a condom over the phone to keep it dry!
Californians are the luckiest because they can take advantage of the frequent earthquakes and tremors to get it on! Sex on a train is possible in the washroom. Most local commuter trains are on rented tracks that are also used by freight trains. This adds a lot of vibration to any train ride. The washroom may be a little cramped, but the excitement of doing something almost in public might add even more zing. I would not consider a roller coaster because the logistics are impossible, and just plain unsafe. Airplanes are at their best in rough weather, but the spoil sports in the cockpits always turn on the seat belt signs. Of course, a blanket or two can give you enough privacy for a quickie. All you rednecks out there already now how amazing sex is in a pickup truck bed. Next time, try it while going over a washboard road. This takes at least one helper, or another couple so you can take turns in the bed of the truck. Of course when going for it in the truck bed, some sort of padding is a necessity. Use and air mattress or at least a couple of yoga pads. Now go have some fun out there!
Ya Hoo!!
If you want some other advice on sex and sexuality, check out these links:
Sex Advice for Men
Sex Advice for Women
