This is a totally unscientific rant based on my own observations of people both in real life and on dating sites. I have observed the online dating industry for some time now, more as a curiosity than as a member. I joined several dating sites some years ago and ended up getting caught up in how it is that people interact online versus real life. I have also discussed dating and relationships extensively with people I have met who are/were in all types and phases of relationships.
So what have I found?
Interestingly enough, not much that has not already been discussed before.
When it comes to people meeting in real life, well, that has been going on for millennia, I have absolutely nothing to add on this topic that has not already been hashed out by writers since the time that man first developed writing.
When it comes to Internet Dating, which has only been in existence since about 1995 or so, there are some insights that can be shared.
So lets start with some popular misconceptions:
Dating Sites Have Fool Proof Matching Formulas
False – The first is that, quite frankly, people lie when they put up their profile information. Garbage in is Garbage out – lets see the brainiacs at the dating sites program around that one.
It Is Less Work To Find My Match On a Dating Site
False – Once you find someone you are interested in, no matter what the relationship you desire, to get on top of it, you have to spend a lot of time getting to know the person. And at some point you will become comfortable that they are not blowing smoke up your tush. If not, all bets are off and you are back to square one looking for someone else who interests you.
Internet Dating Sites are a Great Place To Find People to Date
True – If you are a person who uses dating to interact with someone that you are interested in; then a dating site is likely to connect you with many more people than you can possibly find via your own means offline.
Internet Dating Sites Are More Likely To Find My Soul Mate.
False – Quantity does not equal quality. Just because you can see and interact with a lot more people online than you can in real life does not mean that you are being exposed to quality people that you have any real compatibility with, and even if you are compatible from an intellectual point of view, there is no guarantee that you will find the chemistry with them that you need to achieve soul mate status.
So What Good Are Dating Sites Anyway They are dynamite if you are willing to be open and look outside of your normal comfort zone for possible matches. They are good for people who have not been successful finding their soul mate in real life because quite frankly they are looking for the wrong type of person in the wrong places. If you approach online dating with an open mind, you will likely be able to interact with many more disparate people then you normally hang out with, and in that process, discover more about what you like in other people, which may just change your mind about who you need in your life to complete you.
To that end, you should approach using an online dating system the way you would approach getting an education. It is possible to educate yourself without going to school, but going to a school makes it easier to obtain a well-rounded education. Similarly, it is possible for you to find the love of your life without using a dating site, but you will likely be exposed to a whole lot more varying people at a dating site than you would by tapping into your circle of friends..
So, open your heart and give online dating a try.
You can start here:
http://www.top100datingpersonals.com/onlinedating.php
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